Heat Wave

By John Clayton

Originally Published in the Monocacy Monocle, Volume V, Number 5, June 9, 2008.

We feel fortunate to have finished this issue of the Monocle after last week’s storms, as discussed in our front page story. Fortunately, none of use were injured or sustained any serious property damage, but some of us were without power or internet service for varying degrees of time, which put a crimp on our production schedule. Everyone has his story to tell after a storm like that. Mine isn’t very interesting (no, I am not going to tell it anyway) because our neighborhood didn’t experience quite the wind event that many others did. These localized microbursts are quite remarkable. Our locale has been the focus of them before, suffering sudden punishing winds, while others not so far away experienced very little in the way of wind. I don’t mind not having had the honor on this particular storm.

We are moving through fairly typical weather for the Monocacy Area, with a cool and wet spring which suddenly gives way to a hot and humid summer, even though it is technically not summer yet. This particular heat and humidity wave isn’t bad for early June. Hot sticky weather and a Washington baseball team in firm possession of last place—it’s like I’m a kid again. We should also appreciate those who soldiered on through the mucky weather at Poolesville’s Relay for Life, and Clarksburg Day, and untold numbers of kid’s outdoor sporting events. No rest for the weary.

Speaking of muck, I suppose that I should comment on the major political event of this season, which is the end of the long, drawn-out Democratic nominating season. I have good news and bad news. Our long national nightmare is over; both parties have selected their candidates. The bad news is that the conventions are still to come, if anyone cares. Couldn’t this be done online? All the delegates could participate in a massive Web conference and just do their drinking at home. Think of all the greenhouse gas emissions that would be avoided by eliminating all that travel, to say nothing of the speeches on stage. I realize the travel and entertainment industry isn’t appreciating this suggestion all that much, but it’s worth considering.

The general election is now five months away. Five months ago was January, which doesn’t seem all that long a time, so it will be upon us in no time. (Author’s Note: Once again, as I have made reference to our long primary season, our internationally minded copyeditor Dominique Agnew reminds me that the Australians, or perhaps it is the French, do their whole election, primaries and everything, in something like six weeks. Either way, she notes, they are both considerable shorter than our year-long torture, and that I should perhaps mention it in my article.) Here, at the Monocle, I am sure that my partner Rande and I will support opposing candidates, although, interestingly, neither of us got our first choice for our respective party’s nomination. I find the generational differences of the two remaining candidates to be the most compelling of all. There are many policy and personality issues to consider, and race will loom, unspoken but nevertheless significant, but I find the considerable age discrepancy fascinating. Bill Clinton, facing George Bush the Elder and Robert Dole, managed to make his opponents appear older and out of touch in various ways. Ronald Reagan managed to make his opponents appear younger and out of touch in probably even more ways, so if you have a convincing angle on how this will play out, I would love to hear it. Being on the Democratic side, I worry that while Senator McCain is indeed old, he doesn’t really come across as old—crotchety, yes, but at least so far, not old geezer crotchety. Senator Obama, to my alarm, often looks, especially at first glance at the microphone, like an overly-earnest kid, which can only be magnified when facing his more seasoned opponent. I’m picking up glimmers of Popeye the Sailor Man facing Alfalfa from Our Gang, but it might just be the heat.